Memoir Mondays - How to Handle Sibling Fighting

It's Monday which means we can play Memoir Monday with Travis at I Like to Fish. I believe the only rule is that your memory has to be true. So write your post, including Travis' book below, and send a link to Travis. He'll post it with others. Check out the other memoirs. They are always good for a laugh.


My dad's uncles and aunts tell stories about how the six boys, three born before and three born after the three girls, terrorized their sister's boyfriends. I had three younger brothers, who never tried to intimidate my boyfriends. I'd like to think it was because they were so much younger than me. However, my parents and brothers will probably tell you that I terrorized my brothers and they probably thought I could look out for myself.


Currently, I'm at least eight inches shorter than the shortest brother. When we were younger, I was bigger for a brief period of time. For the most part I ignored my brothers. I was older. I was the only girl and I was "the favorite" if you want to believe them. (I chose to think I was the obedient and complacent child who rarely tested my parent's rules.)

My favorite story of my domination over my brothers is when I was in middle school. My parents had unique ways of handling typical parenting problems. We had to earn "chits" to watch TV. For every hour of TV I wanted to watch, I had to read 30 minutes and exercise outside 30 minutes. My brothers just had to read, because being outside wasn't a problem for them. I remember my mom got tried of me yelling, so she had me yell in the closest until I got it out of my system. Then they had their way of us settling our sibling fights. They bought boxing gloves and established a boxing ring outside and set the ground rules.


My middle brother (because the two younger ones are twins) was and still is a cocky guy. I don't remember the "fight" but I do remember my parents taking us outside to settle it. My brother, already taller than me by sixth grade, was dancing around me and throwing jabs being overly of himself. Thinking this whole way of dealing with sibling fighting was stupid, I just stood there with my gloves on and my hands down wondering when my parents were going to call off this foolishness. After all, I was a girl and their princess.



My brother started getting too close to me and my parents weren't stepping in. I am very protective of my face, having caught so many balls with my nose and eye glasses. So, I threw my first punch. It sent my brother flying backwards and through the screen door, knocking his ego down in the process. My parents never pulled out the gloves again to resolve our differences. I don't remember if it was because they decided it wasn't a good idea, or if all my brothers decided not to mess with me.

What have you or your parents done to handle typical parenting problems in your home?

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Kicking vs Kissing

I start with a little housekeeping:

• For all you who are worried about me, I expect kicking to happen in 2nd grade recess, but I don't expect kissing. And since Faith said the kicking was an accident, I didn't call the school about it. Now if there was kissing going on, I'd be on the phone to the school.
• I was able to live with a dead mouse in the basement all day because I can avoid the basement. I made my husband take us out to dinner since I couldn't go into the basement with a dead mouse. That's where the extra freezer and canned goods are.
• I'm taking a couple days off blogging to concentrate on writing and building my freelance business. But I'll be back soon, because blogging is an addiction I can't kick. (Like watching Nancy Grace, who I can't stand, but I can't seem to stop myself from checking in every night to see if I still can't stand her.)
• Thanks for all your voting on Purple Man's La Dee Dah soap commercial. We are pulling ahead of Travis @ I Like to Fish. Voting ends Monday at 11:59 p.m. And you can vote once a day. So, if you are so inclined. We'd love for you to vote again and keep the gap growing. Here is the link to the four videos in the contest. I should warn a few friends that the two middle videos are suggestive. (I didn't warn anyone before, and I've heard back from a number of people.)
• Speaking of not warning anyone. It didn't occur to me to tell my own kids not to watch the two middle videos. Then one day I hear Jonathan yelling upstairs, "That's disgusting!" Oops. Glad I didn't have to answer any awkward questions after that.

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We received eight and a half inches this storm, the third of the season. Normally we get one good snowfall a year...in March. I know we aren't the only ones getting more snow than usual.

If you want to worry about someone, you should worry about Jonathan, who thinks wrapping his blanket around his head is enough to keep him warm before he goes out to play in the snow.

Just so you don't worry about my parenting, I did make him dress appropriately before going out. Here he's helping Dad clear the snow off the back deck. 

 

Helping Dad lasted all of four minutes before he was making angels and eating snow.

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Friday Fragments - Voting, Playground Kissing and Dead Mice

First of all, if you are new to our blog, please watch the video below of Jonathan dressed up as his comic book character, Purple Man. He and his siblings are in a commercial for La Dee Dah Soaps over at Lee's Headaches, Hormones and Hot Flashes. If you think it worthy, please link to Lee's blog and vote for "Corrie" in the right side bar about three items down from her banner. Travis @ I Like To Fish is gaining on us and threatens to overtake us. And that was after he made a plea to his peeps to vote for Jonathan's Purple Man video. (Because Travis is a stand up guy and because he wants Jonathan and his siblings to wint the $50 prize. So go to his blog and give him some loving, he loves to be loved.)

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Faith: Someone ki...me at recess today!

Me: Someone kissed you?

Faith: No! Somone kicked me.

Me: Oh. Well that's okay then.

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Me (calling my husband at his office): Is there a reason you left a dead mouse in the middle of the pantry?

Scott: There is a dead mouse in the middle of the pantry?

Me: Yes. There is no way you could've missed it. It is right in the middle of the path to your office.

Scott: It wasn't there when I was in my office this morning.

Me: I can assure you that it's been dead awhile.

Scott: It must have fallen out of the box I brought out of the office.

Me: Okay, but I'm warning you, it's still gonna be there when you get home.

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Here is another meme. It is a great way to share things bits and pieces which can't fill an entire post. So if you like this meme and have some fragments to share, grab Mrs. 4444's button, write your post and then link up with others playing along.

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Thursday's Tackle - Online Vacation to Las Vegas

I decided on Thursdays I would challenge myself to write about new or possibly controversial subjects. I need to stretch myself  and my writing skills to become marketable. I need writing samples to provide to potential clients. Thus, I decided to have an on-going experiment on Thursdays when I tackle a subject outside my normal area of expertise and possibly comfort zone. I submit for your reading pleasure, my first "Thursday Tackle."

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I love the Internet. When there is a question, I sit down at my laptop and search the World Wide Web for answers. This summer Jorge asked about his beloved new discovery Peanut Butter. He also wanted to know about the origin of hot dogs. When he returned to Spain, I looked up pictures and information about Spain. Recently I was looking at pictures of his one month tour through the U.S.A. with fellow exchange students. His second favorite place was Las Vegas. So I explored Las Vegas through my Internet connection as I'm wearing my CSI Las Vegas T-shirt, of course.

I discovered that I can enjoy a trip to Las Vegas without leaving my home! You doubt me? Well, let me show you how I did it and then judge for yourself. First of all, I found my own personal on-line tour guide, Darin, who did a podcast to show me some of the sites in and around Las Vegas. Just to expose my ignorance, I didn't know that people could visit Lake Mead (the first National Recreational Area), the Hoover Dam or The Valley of Fire while visiting Las Vegas. I was able to see the natural red rock formations of the landscape without suffering through the desert heat on a tour bus.

I love shows. So I wondered what kinds of shows I could take in while vacationing from home. I couldn't decide between the Cirque Du Soleil or Blue Man Group, so I did both. I love how realistic these videos are. If I was actually in Las Vegas, I would be way up in the nose bleed section and have to look around the heads of those in front of me. Look! I can even enjoy the water fountain show at the Bellagio to the sound of Sarah Brightman (whom I adore from Andrew Lloyd Weber productions).

Okay, I've done a little sight seeing around the city, I've gone to some shows. What else is there for me to do while I'm on my virtual vacation?  I discovered a site which has all kinds of information about Las Vegas entertainment. From this site I was able to discover an exhibit of real human bodies on loan from China. This display shows the insides of humans. I was all ready to take my on-line tour of this exhibit, but sadly the video was only a tease. Bummer. (But maybe for the best since I'm not into blood, guts, hearts, livers, etc.) I also found that I could do some shopping, but I'm not into shopping.

I discovered that my Vegas Online trip can include the activity for which Las Vegas is most famous. I can play all the gambling games online which would be available to me if I actually fly out there. I decided I would do what I'd do if I really visited Las Vegas.  I'm going to wait until youngest kids are in bed, pour myself a glass of Merlot and pull out the $20 I'm going to allow myself to lose. (Don't worry, my husband will hide all the credit cards and sit beside me to keep me honest.) Hum? What should I do with my mad money? I think I'll play Black Jack. And when I'm done, I'm going to turn on my DVR and watch the CSI Las Vegas episode when Sara returns.

But before I conclude my brief fantasy vacation, I just had to share this one last site I found, you know, in case I actually went there. This site displays lots of information about the city including a page which has researched visiting Las Vegas from the point-of-view of visitors with special needs. You know, with Jonathan, I have a soft spot in my heart for places which provide access for those with physical challenges.

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Okay, I don't know if I was successful in my first attempt at writing something different. First of all, it was way too much fun and not challenging at all. Secondly, it just sounds like me writing about something other than Jonathan and things related to special needs. What do you think? Hopefully I find something different next week to tackle.

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Wednesday - Week Three

Now is Faith's turn to be sick. I realized yesterday this is the third child and third week someone has been home sick. I don't know if you can see how red her cheeks are. For both Jonathan and Faith, this is a sign of fever and/or illness.

Be still my heart. A homemade zip line over a  small ravine in our yard. It's about an 8-10 foot drop, just enough to break a leg. I didn't let him try with the wire hangers. I only know about this new creation because he came in looking to replace the plastic hangers which broke. I made him show me what he was doing before I banned him from doing it.

And once again it was our neighbor's son who taught them a dangerous game. A couple years ago, they came home and talked about same neighbor trying to start a fire in same ravine. My husband put a stop to that. Thankfully, said neighbor is four years older, and will be out of high school before Jonathan starts.

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More Convos - School Related

Yesterday report cards came home.

Jonathan (give Faith a big hug): Faith, good job! You did awesome. I'm proud of you.
Faith (being squeezed tightly): Uh, huh.
Jonathan: You are really smart. Not as smart as I am, because I got all 'A's and you got one 'B' but that's okay, I'm older.

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Jonathan: I'm going to be a math teacher when I grow up.

Me: I thought you were going to be a pilot.

Jonathan: I'm going to be a math teacher after I'm in the Navy.

Me: I thought you were going to be a cartoonist.

Jonathan: Yeah, after I'm done with soccer.

Me: You are are going to be really busy. First a pilot in the Navy, then a soccer player, then a cartoonist and finally a math teacher.

Jonathan: Yeah.

Me: You know you can play soccer and draw cartoons even while you are in the Navy?

Jonathan: Okay.

Me: Faith, what are you going to do when you grow up?

Faith: I'm going to be a nurse.

Me: Oh, wow! That's a first. You do know that being a nurse involves blood, pee, poop and vomit?

Faith: Ewwww. Momma!. That's gross.

Me: What did you think a nurse does?

Faith: Just walks into the room, talks the the patient and leaves.

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My Gift to International Peacekeeping

It's Monday and I'm playing with Travis at I Like To Fish. Mondays are for writing Memoirs. The only rule is that it has to be a true story. So read my post, write your story, grab Travis' button (although I'm sure he'd love for you to grab his bottom, because he's that kinda guy). Then go to I Like to Fish and post your link to your story. That easy.


Yesterday I told you about the bugs in our basement and the reason why I married my husband. Today I'll tell you more bug stories but not about my husband.

If you've been  reading my blog forever, you'll remember Jorge, the Spanish exchange student we hosted for seven months last year. For those of you who are new, and interested, you can read about Jorge here.

Jorge lives in an apartment in a large city in Spain off the Atlantic coast. When he came to live with us in a small town with a house surrounded by trees, he learned more than just cultural things. He learned about the difference between city living and country living. We have bugs in the house. Apparently he didn't have too many bugs in his apartment back home. And when he did, he cowered with his baby sister in the corner.



One day, when I was washing dishes and Jorge was drying (our nightly ritual) we got to talking about growing up and getting married. I told him the reason I married Scott was to kill the bugs. At the end of my story, Jorge announced that he was going to "man up," a phrase he picked up in America.

Prior to this point, he'd freak out over the bugs we'd find in our basement or garage. He'd actually avoid these places if a bug was spotted. (I have lots of Jorge bug stories, but I'll spare you.) True to his word, there was no bug that was safe in our house after that day, even if the bugs stayed out of sight for the most part. If Jorge saw it scampering away, that bug's days were numbered. Jorge's war on bugs was just like everything else Jorge does. "They will not win, I'm more stubborn." For a week Jonathan and Jorge each saw a roach in their shared bathroom, but it always escaped them. So one day, Jorge decides "This bug will not get away anymore."

I wish we had video camera then. Their bathroom was small and full of nooks and crannies. The bug would get behind the toilet where it couldn't be reached. However, on this day, Jorge was particularly stubborn. He got a shoe in each hand. With one arm, he'd reach around behind the toilet and cause the bug to run around to the other side. The problem was, when Jorge tired to get him with the other hand, he'd move his arm out from behind the toilet where the bug would retreat again. The bathroom was too small for anyone else to be on one side of the toilet while Jorge was chasing it out. It was quite comical watching this cat and mouse game with Jorge twisted in all kinds of ways trying to get the roach out into the open where he could smash it. Eventually Jorge won the battle. The bug died a traumatic death.

One of the greatest accomplishments in my life is knowing I made the world a better place, when I sent Jorge home to his country as a man willing to do what it takes to kill bugs for all his country women. I'll accept any Nobel Peace Prize nominations, thank you.

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The GateKeeper

First, I'd like to welcome all my new visitors and followers from Friday Followers and Friday Fragments. I'm working on getting by all  your places to comment and follow too.

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A number of years ago Josh started talking about having his bedroom downstairs in the basement guest room/office. I wasn't crazy about this idea for a number of reasons. One of them being the walk-out door to the basement and us sleeping two floors above him. We already had problems with some of the more wild neighborhood kids going in and out that door, which we never use. (We only discovered others using the door because we asked our kids why we had leaves in the basement.)

One day, after we'd been gone for a week on vacation, I went down to the basement and into the office/guest room and stopped short at the sight of a big spider. It looked like this:

Me: "Scott, there is a really big spider down here."

Scott: "How big can it be?"

Me: "You'll have to come see for yourself. It's pretty big."

Scott: "Wow! I didn't believe you when you said it was a big spider."

Scott killed it and cleaned it up. But later I regretted it.

Me: "You know how Joshua doesn't like bugs."

Scott: "Yes."

Me: "We should've kept that spider and had it patrol between the bedroom and the walk-out basement door. There's no way Josh would ever attempt to cross that spider."

Scott: "Oh, yeah. Kind of like a gatekeeper."

From that day on we started referring to the spiders we find in the basement as "Gatekeepers." And that spider set the standard by which all other spiders would be measured.

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So this week I went downstairs to the extra freezer to get some Popsicles for Jonathan. I turned on the light to the pantry and standing between me and the freezer was a Junior Gatekeeper. Normally, my philosophy about critters in my basement is "as long as I don't see you, you can stay in the basement." (If I know there is a critter living there, I even yell down giving it enough warning to hide from my sight.)

I'm looking at Junior and he's not moving. I stomp my slippered foot close to him, but he's not moving. I step over him, get my Popsicles and step back over him. He's still not moving. On the other side, I chuckled, "Are you dead or are you playing possum?" No movement. I step out of the pantry look over my shoulder, still hasn't moved. I flip the light off and flip it back on just in time to see Junior racing for the plastic storage bins.

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Junior was lucky that I didn't feel like dealing with him that day. My normal M.O. (Modus Operandi) is to drop a big book on the gatekeepers and leave the book where it lands.

Scott: "Corrie, there is a book in the middle of the pantry. Am I to assume there is a smashed bug under it for me to clean up?"

Me: "Yes, dear. It's going to be messy. It made a really big squish."

Scott: "Okay, just checking."

Me: "Thanks, Honey. You know it's the second reason I married you - to take care of the bugs. The first being that you drop me off and pick me up at the front door when there is weather."

Scott: "Yes, I know my place."

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The Road to Good Health

Sick

Getting better (his second and third sandwich)

Back to normal

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Friday Fragments - Pukey and Pantless

Here is another meme. It is a great way to share things bits and pieces which can't fill an entire post. So if you like this meme and have some fragments to share, grab Mrs. 4444's button, write your post and then link up with others playing along.

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Thanks for all the well wishes and prayers yesterday. Jonathan slept the entire day. Very. Very. Unusual. About 4:00 p.m. I decided that I needed to take him in to the doctor, who holds walk-in hours on Thursday evenings. During the ninety minutes we were there, a two year old puked twice and a mother of three spoke on her cellphone about a corrections officer's visit to her home that afternoon. I was mentally kicking myself for dragging us up there when the doctor would just send us home to do what we've already been doing. So I was somewhat relieved when Jonathan was diagnosed with strep throat. So I was glad I took him in.

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Scott: Why does Jonathan have 37 pairs of pants and only 4 shirts in the laundry every week?
Me: Because he takes off his pants as soon as he walks in the door and then puts on a new pair when he leaves or someone comes over.

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I told Scott, "About noon the second dose of antibiotic will kick in and it will coincide with the second day of not taking the anti-anxiety and ADHD meds. When you come home from work you'll have to peel both me and him off the wall."

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Please, if haven't seen Jonathan's Purple Man video yet, go to Lee's Headaches, Hormones and Hot Flashes. We are the fourth video in a contest. She says we can vote through January 31st. Voting is on the right sidebar, about the third item down. Vote for "Corrie." I promised the kid's the $50 gift card since they created the video. I just held the camera and edited the video.

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Purple Man's Perfeckto with Attitude

I love today's Purple Man because it seems to summarize many of the blogs I've been reading lately.

I also love how Purple Man, the hero in the comics, is often an anti-hero. Like here, he's sneaking up on Perfeckto who's a little stressed out. Hero flattened by side kick.

Then the comic I had recently when hero is being chased around by a cat. (Jonathan pointed out how comic artists put their name in one of their frames. So he's done the same thing.)

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Jonathan was up all last night throwing up. He's still in bed right now, highly unusual for him. Please send him your loving and/or prayers. He doesn't drink anything but water, and not very much of that, so I'm concerned about dehydration.

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Wordless Wednesdays - Brothers!

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Post It Note Tuesday

It's Tuesday! Time to play with Supah Mommy and all her friends. Post-It Notes, can you say it in just a few words? Try.

 

 

 

 

 

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Please, if haven't seen Jonathan's Purple Man video yet, go to Lee's Headaches, Hormones and Hot Flashes. We are the fourth video in a contest. She says we can vote through January 31st. Voting is on the right sidebar and you vote for "Corrie." I promised the kid's the $50 gift card since they did the commercial all by themselves. I only held the camera and edited. Please tweet and retweet this shortened URL: http://bit.ly/5oSYj6

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Memoir Monday - Hyperactive from Conception

Congratulations to Mad Mom, who won the Special Needs Advocacy Resource book signed by one of it is authors. We wrote all the names on a piece of paper and Jonathan drew a name. 

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It's Monday and I'm playing Memoir Monday with Travis and friends @ I Like To Fish. The only rule is the story has to be true. So if you have a story, grab the button above and come share it will everyone else.

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Have you ever had a soda bottle or can rolling around in the back of your car? At one point in my pregnancy with Jonathan, I read in a book that he was about the size of a soda can. The image stuck with me since I just started feeling Jonathan moving. It felt like a soda can rolling back and forth in my stomach.

Jonathan never stopped moving. The doctor, nurses and sonogram techs complained that he was very active. They had a hard time locating his heart beat or anything else they wanted or needed to see.

When I was 34 weeks pregnant, my blood pressure shot through the roof. The doctor decided to hospitalize me and induce Jonathan at 36 weeks. When the doctor made this decision, Jonathan was not turned down in the birthing position. So the doctor spent about thirty minutes "turning" Jonathan. It was a painful process of applying pressure on my stomach until the doctor got Jonathan in the correct position.

In the middle of the night I felt my insides flop. When the doctor came to check me the next morning, I told him what happened. He ordered a sonogram and sure enough, Jonathan was back to sitting upright in my stomach. The doctor decided to wait until we got closer to when Jonathan was induced before turning him again. For the next eight days Jonathan was positioned every which way but upside down. Fortunately, the day he was induced, Jonathan was in the correct position, so we didn't have to turn him again.

This should have been the first clue that Jonathan was going to be hyperactive after birth too.

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Please go vote for Jonathan's video over at Lee's Headaches, Hormones and Hot Flashes. She says we can through January 31st. I promised the kid's the $50 gift card since they did the commercial all by themselves. I only held the camera and edited. Please tweet and retweet this shortened URL:

http://bit.ly/5oSYj6

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Howe Business

This video is only 53 seconds. I don't know why it goes on for over two minutes. Sorry.

Just a little bit of fun in the Howe house. See how Jonathan "marches to his own tuba player?" The boy who doesn't like to wear underwear is wearing it on his head, hands and around his ankles.

What am I going to do with that boy?

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Please go vote for Jonathan's video over at Lee's Headaches, Hormones and Hot Flashes. She says we can vote early and often through January 31st. I promised the kid's the $50 gift card since they did the commercial all by themselves. I only held the camera and edited. Please tweet and retweet this shortened URL:

http://bit.ly/5oSYj6

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More Dinner Conversations

Please go vote for Jonathan's video over at Lee's Headaches, Hormones and Hot Flashes. She says we can vote early and often through January 31st. I promised the kid's the $50 gift card since they did the commercial all by themselves. I only held the camera and edited. Please tweet and retweet this shortened URL:

http://bit.ly/5oSYj6

I posted this during the time when everyone was having a difficult time getting to my blog (including me), so hopefully it is new to the majority. The above is of one of the last meals we had with Jorge before he returned to Spain. The conversations below is during an all-you-can-eat buffet, where my picky eater is in heaven.

Faith: What did you get?

Jonathan: Pizza, mashed potatoes, mac and cheese and green beans. What did you get?

Faith: Spaghetti and mac and cheese.

Jonathan: Where are your green beans?

Faith: Yuck!

Jonathan: (shrugs) Your loss.

Faith: I would've gotten cheese pizza, but there wasn't any left.

Jonathan: Yeah, I know. The person in front of me took the last piece. I thought about you, but I figured they are going to make more.

During the dinner conversation Joshua was showing my parents his "press pass" he has for his high school yearbook which allows him to leave class when necessary to take photos of events and interview people.

Jonathan: Can I have that?

Josh: It has my picture on it.

Jonathan: So.

Me: Jonathan, why do you want Joshua's press pass?

Jonathan: So I can get out of class.


Jonathan: Mama, we had our reading benchmarks yesterday. I passed. I think I got at least a B.

Me: Did Ms. G tell you that you passed?

Jonathan: No, I just know. The test gets sent away, fed into a computer to read the answers, yada, yada, yada.

Reminds me of when he was in kindergarten and we took him for independent evaluations for his disability. The psychologist explained one of the evaulations given to Jonathan indicates when he receives a long term of verbal communication he's not able to interpret it all. "To him it sounds like Charlie Brown's teacher."

Jonathan's first kindergarten teacher would send notes home complaining that he was disrespectful because he'd say to her, "Blah, Blah, Blah."

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Friday Fragments - Jonathan's Brotherly Love

Here is another meme. It is a great way to share things bits and pieces which can't fill an entire post. So if you like this meme and have some fragments to share, grab Mrs. 4444's button, write your post and then link up with others playing along.

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Speaking of Mrs. 4444, we had an email exchange which reminded me of Jonathan and Faith's relationship. Mrs. 4444 posted a picture of her son decked out in hair clips his sister put in his hair. The picture clearly showed the admiration she had for her brother. Mom said sister has loved brother since day one. It reminded me of photos I have of Jonathan and Faith through the years. Only Jonathan adored Faith since day one.

When I put together Faith's baby album, I noticed Jonathan was in every picture of Faith in the hospital regardless of who was holding her.

We have a friend, who is an Occupational Therapist, who helped us discover that holding babies calmed Jonathan down. We tried weights, but it was only babies that calm Jonathan. Even now he loves to hold babies.

I think this might be the only picture that they both are smiling without an prompting.

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Today is the first day we haven't had snow on our back deck since December 20th. Like, I read on someone's blog, I know this might not be a big deal for other parts of the world, but when we are surrounded by salty ocean water from the Atlantic Ocean within 1 to 20 miles on three sides of our property, snow is unusual. And having snow remain for nearly a month is rare.

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Jonathan and Faith are home from school today for a teacher training day. They are watching Agent Oso on Disney. For those who don't know, this show is about a Panda Bear who is sent on missions to help kids complete tasks. At this moment he is helping a boy catch a firefly. The show is teaching kids about sequencing. The show is really too young for my kids, but Jonathan is making it more entertaining for himself.

TV: You need to help Nancy make frozen pops.

Jonathan: You can choose your mission, you can help Nancy make frozen pops or go to New York and defuse a bomb.

TV: Help William find a firefly.

Jonathan: His name is not William. It is Billy Bob.

TV: Put your hand gently over the firefly.

Jonathan: (Acting it out and then opening hands to take a peek) I'm blind! I'm blind!

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TMI - In Jonathan's Naked Glory

This meme has been around awhile, but I haven't played. Of course, since I try to keep this blog mostly about Jonathan and daily life of living with special needs, I haven't really had any material. After all, what kinda trouble can a nine year old get into? But I decided a I have a collection of blackmail stories for when he gets older. I can probably play this at least once. So if you find this to be a fun meme, grab the button and go visit LiLu over at livitluvit.com

For the first time since January 1st, the weather is supposed to be above freezing where we live. The last time we had a long period of below freezing weather and then a warm up to 50 degree, Jonathan was about almost five. We have a big trampoline outside, which helps him with his high energy level and his need to bump into people or things. After days of being in the house, we sent him outside to the trampoline. After a little while I look out the back window to check on him. He's in his birthday suit.
Me: Jonathan, where are your clothes?
Jonathan: It's too hot to wear clothes!

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Knowing the above, that it was hard to keep Jonathan in clothes when he was younger, we got a note from his first Kindergarten teacher complaining about the fact that Jonathan wouldn't keep his shoes on in class. My in-laws happened to be visiting when we got this note. Someone said, "She's lucky that's all he takes off in class." The statement hit a phone bone and we all ended up laughing so hard, we cried.

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For about the first eight years of Jonathan's life, nakedness was an issue. Again, after eight years, our family, extended family, church family and neighbors were all accustomed to Jonathan walking into a room in his birthday suit. However, he was getting older and we really wanted to break him of the habit. Scott and I had seen a scene between Mattew McConaughey and Terry Bradshaw in the move Failure to Launch.

So we established "naked zones" for Jonathan. If he wanted to be naked, he could be naked in his room or in the bathroom. We tried to convince him that the chin up bar in the doorway was NOT part of the naked zone. For months we would walk up the stairs and get an eye full of Jonathan swinging on his bar in all his glory.

* * * * * * * * *

We were trying to potty training Jonathan. He had pooped once in the potty a year before, but he didn't continue. In his mind he did it once. He showed us he could do it but, frankly, he felt pooping in Pull-ups was more convenient and didn't feel the need to change what was working for him. One day I was staying in the hospital with Faith, who was admitted for a bad virus. A friend of ours kept Jonathan a few hours during the day. The friend read Jonathan his favorite book "Everybody Poops" which is a really cute book showing how all animals poop. You have to know our friend (whose name also happens to be Scott) to know that he was quite tickled with this book and having a conversation with Jonathan about pooping. Scott found out that Jonathan agrees that everyone poops but Daddy. The two had quite a long and involved conversation but Jonathan couldn't be convinced that Daddy poops. I think because Daddy disappears and reappears and doesn't announce what he is doing. And none of the kids follow Daddy to the bathroom, unlike when Mommy goes and they sit outside the door.

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What I Meant To Say Wednesday

This looked like a fun meme to participate in. So if you have something that you meant to say, grab Chief's button, write your post and then link up over at (Hiding from the Kids).

Situation: It was the last day of school, I had an appointment to meet with the Vice Principal of the school. I'd waited three weeks for this meeting. The following day I was leaving for vacation and wouldn't return until the VP was on vacation. My question: "What resources can you recommend for me to work with Jonathan over the summer? I want to set him up for success next year by working on his spelling weakness and his reading comprehension.?"

I'll start off with what I did say: Twenty minutes before the scheduled meeting, the secretary calls:
Secretary: "I'm sorry Ms. Howe, something has come up and (VP) can't meet with you. I'm calling to reschedule."
Me: "Oh, no! I waited three weeks for this meeting. It was (VP's) fault that we waited until the last day of school. Someone is meeting with me today. I don't care who it is."
Secretary: "I'm sorry, Mrs. Howe. This thing that has come up couldn't be helped and (VP) can't meet. No one is available to meet with you. They are all wrapped up in this situation. You'll understand once you find out what it is. I can't tell you right now what it is."
Me: "This is unacceptable, I'm calling the school board to complain."
Secretary: "You do what you have to do."

Call to School Board: I found out that the school was on a partial lock down because the police were chasing an unknown suspect on the back part of the county property which the schools were on (the middle school, high school and elementary school). Don't let this fool you. The area where they were was at least three miles away.
Secretary at School Board: "A partial lock down means the schools and locked, but everything should be run as usual."
Me: "In other words, there really wasn't a need to cancel the meeting."
Secretary: "I can't comment on that."

What I Meant To Say Was: "In other words, the VP is not required to stand by the front doors with an AK-47 during a partial lock down and therefore would've been free to meet with me."

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I couldn't get Jonathan to play Post It Note Tuesday with me today. Faith was all game. I'll save hers for when I can get Jonathan to play. In the meantime, here are my Post Its. If you haven't tried this meme, it's really fun. Just take SupahMommy's button below, post your notes and then link up with everyone else playing the game.

 

 

 

 

 

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Failure or Success?

"Failure is only the opportunity to begin again, only this time more wisely."

Henry Ford

This weekend my educational consultant asked me to be on a panel for a class about special education advocacy. The class teaches advocacy to anyone who might be interested. In this particular class, general education teachers, special education directors and other experts were there to learn more about special education advocacy either to help them in their jobs or as a possible career change.

After the panel of parents spoke and answered questions, the class had a special education attorney, who who has argued two special education cases before the U.S. Supreme Court and "lost" both. It was really interesting listening to him talk about how his losses where more successful than his wins. He felt this way about both the supreme court cases and the various special education due process hearings a long the way.

The timing of Saturday was perfect. Friday, Scott and I met with the school team for a third time last week to discuss Jonathan's weaknesses. (For those new to the blog or haven't read in awhile, I'm sorry. You'll have to read a few more posts in order to understand. It's too long to rehash again.)


Jonathan will have everything we wanted an Individualized Educational Plan to provide him. He'll have all these under Section 504 of the Rehabilitation Act of 1973. (We tried to get Jonathan an Individualized Educational Plan under the federal law Individuals with Disabilities Act.) The plan Jonathan will now receive is called a Section 504 Plan. This plan provides accommodations and modifications to Jonathan's environment to make sure he is on a level playing ground in school. (An Individualized Educational Plan provides specially designed instruction to remediate learning disabilities along with accommodations and modifications.)



As I explained before under a Section 504 Jonathan will be given extra time to complete his assignments and he'll even be given a access to a keyboard, a spell checker and a writing program to help him complete his work. While I appreciate these things to accommodate Jonathan's weaknesses, it does not teach him the proper mechanics of writing so that he will be able to advance to college or apply for a job.


What we wanted from the Individualized Educational Plan was some to sit down with him and provide instruction as to why his writing mechanics were wrong across all areas of curriculum. (He was only being graded on his writing mechanics during the grammar section of the day, he was not held to the same standard during social studies, science, literacy, etc. Therefore Jonathan was learning that proper writing mechanics don't matter except in certain cases.) 

We also wanted someone to  show him strategies for self monitoring the quality of his work. For example give him a mnemonic to help him edit after each assignment. In this case C.O.P.S. Capitalization, Organization, Punctuation and Spelling. Of course, we can teach these things at home, but if they are not being reinforced in the classroom, Jonathan won't "get it." 


The good news is that Jonathan's 504 Plan now includes these pieces. A teacher (not just his current general education teacher, but any teacher working with him) will need to go over his papers and tell him why they circled his mistakes an how he needs to go about correcting them. (Up until Friday, his mistakes were circled but no one sat him down and explained to him why he was wrong or how he could improve the next time. Many of the skills Jonathan learns have to be broken down into small pieces and explicitly taught to him. He doesn't "just get it" like his peers will.) The good news is that Jonathan is smart enough that it won't take long for him to learn these skills. Even the school team agreed that while it might take some initial extra time and work up front for staff, in the long run, it will save everyone a lot of time and effort.


I won't go into all the things negotiated out between us and the school, but just wanted to let you know that while we "failed" to get Jonathan an Individualized Educational Plan, but we did "succeed" in getting Jonathan everything we wanted on that plan. The school wants to meet again at the end of the school year to make sure it is all working before he moves up into 5th grade. His 5th grade teacher will be hand-selected again and towards the end of 6th grade, the elementary school will facilitate a meeting between them, the middle school and Jonathan's parents to provide a smooth transition. 


I'm sure none of this would've happened had I not educated myself on the laws, Jonathan's disability and how to become an effective advocate. Part of my desire in writing this blog about Jonathan, and attempting to keep my focus on him, is to be a resource for other parents in similar circumstances. 


My Educational Consultant co-authored a book "Special Needs Advocacy Resource Book: What You Can Do Now to Advocate For Your Exceptional Child's Education"
 
She gave me some copies free this weekend for my participation in her panel. And she even signed them for me. I'd love to give one away this week. So here is what I'm asking of those who would like a chance to win.

• Go to my Blog Roll and see if you know of a link to other special needs blogs that I don't currently have. Then put their link in the comments, so that I can follow them.
• Let others know of this give-a-way, if you think they might want a chance to win.
• Let me know in the comments if you want a chance to win. You don't have to have an exceptional child. Feel free to give this to someone you know could use it. (Cinda, I'd even be happy if you'd like a copy for one of your students or for your own resource.)
  
• Please don't feel like you can't comment today if you don't want the book. I'll take comments just for the sake of comments. ;-)

I'll take entries all week and pull a random comment number on Friday and make the announcement on Saturday.

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Sunday's in My City

I was driving over the bridge between my county and the next county over. It was a beautiful scene, fog over a river and covering a quaint island. I figured this would be a perfect time to play "Sunday's in My City" over at Unknown Mami. Here is her button. If you want to play, go to her site and Link up with other blogs.

Jonathan once said, "We are pretty close to the end of the world." See the map below. See Route 4? Well, if you follow it northwest about 90 miles, you'll be in front of the White House. Yes, the one where the Obamas live. I took my pictures on the top of the bridge where the word "Solomons" is on the map. The big body of water is the Chesapeake Bay. The little river which empties into the bay is Patuxent River. Notice how there is only one major road down this peninsula?

The fog over the bay and river made me think of Solomons as a picture postcard. I guess if I wasn't taking the picture with my cellphone as I'm driving 55 miles an hour over the two lane bridge, it might look like a picture postcard.

You might be familiar with where Jonathan's live without really knowing. We've been on TV quite a bit lately. This story made international news! Jonathan's Pop Pop was in Greece when he saw this on the BBC.

Maryland Mother Jailed After Bodies of 2 Children Found in Freezer

I think only a couple of weeks later this next national story broke:

 

America's Most Wanted: Four Kidnappers and a Bank Heist

And my absolute favorite. If you watch the show "Speeders" on TruTV, then you see our own most famous cop Anthony "Mosquito" Moschetto. (My kids and I got to eat lunch with the elected local sheriff Mike Evans, this summer. Sheriff Evans said that Officer Moschetto is the 5th most popular officer on the TV show.)

A speeder's best friend  (The YouTube video prevented me from embedding it, so you'll have to go to this link.)

And you should be glad that we "live at the end of the world" because that's where the natural gas storage facility and a nuclear power plant live as well. One is a quarter of a mile from us and the other 15 minutes from us.

Other than the above, it is a really nice place to raise kids. Honest.

(P.S. Please don't think that I don't love where I live just because I aired our dirty laundry. After all I am about entertaining. And I feel so safe about the natural gas storage and nuclear power plant, that I haven't looked at the emergency evacuation plan since they first sent it out. What's entertaining about living in a piece of paradise at the end of the world?)  

Now go to Unknown Mami's and link up with other bloggers showing off their cities. 

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Saturday Snipppets

Early this week Travis at I like to Fish, tweeted something along the lines of "The Lord may not have given me good looks or (male enhancement), but He did give me a sense of humor." First of all, Travis, I have to disagree about the good lucks, I have no knowledge about your size nor care to know and I agree you have a sense of humor.


Travis' tweet reminded me of Jonathan, who was 4 years old at the time. He was sitting in the back seat of the mini-van and we were leaving the driveway (which if you recall is long and steep), out of nowhere Jonathan breaks into an out loud spontaneous prayer. "Dear Lord, thank you for my wonderful penis. Amen." I almost wrecked the car.

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Me (tugging at Jonathan's pants which are shrinking and above his ankles): "Jonathan! Stop growing!"

Jonathan: "I want to."

Me (chuckling): "No you don't want to stop growing. You want to be taller than Joshua."

Jonathan: "True, I want to grow taller, but not older, because I never want to be too old for Super Smash Brothers Melee."

 * * * * * * * * *

Remember the conversation earlier this week where Jonathan couldn't find butter, Faith was annoyed because she could see it across the room and I said it was a male thing?

I loved bluecottonmemory's theory about this. "It's a proven fact that guys can find anything that moves (hunter) and women find anything that doesn't (gatherers.)"

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Thursday morning I had to wake Jonathan up, which in itself is unusual. Normally I say his name, his eyes immediately pop open, he pops out of bed with all the energy and cheerfulness of the hyperactive kid whose goal in life is to be Peter Pan, never grow up and to always have fun. But not Thursday.

I tired to get Jonathan more energized and happy. I sang "This is the day, this is the day, this is the day that the Lord has made. I will be glad, I will be glad and rejoice in it. And rejoice in it...."

Jonathan, with the same blank face and lack of emotion as he woke up with, said, "The thing is, Mom, everyday is a day the Lord has made."

I put this story on Facebook and a friend of mine came back with:

Friend: "I still haven't grown up and I always like to have fun so I guess I could be Peter Pan. However, I don't look good in tights."

Me: "Ewwww. Now I can't get that image out of my head. A six foot two man with facial hair in tights...Nope, it's stuck now."
Friend: "What if it was Brad Pitt????"
Me: "Are you comparing yourself to him? Doesn't matter anyway. I don't like him either. I adore Mark Harmon, but not in tights."

* * * * * * * * *

I posted this picture from Faith New Year's Eve. I asked for some help for a caption that I can attach to this photo in the future. I think I'm going with Alexis AKA MOM's suggestion "I partied until the balloon fell. What? It's as good as the ball dropping, right?"

I mostly went with this because this is exactly something Faith would (as does) say. But I loved all the suggestions and laughed at them.

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I had an email exchange this week with Judith Ellis at The Being Brand. The conversation turned to Jonathan's lack of affection, in the "normal" sense. This is not unusual for people diagnosed with autism. We are actually very fortunate because Jonathan is "very affection" compared to what I've heard from other parents.

First, I guess everyone family expresses affection differently (and culturally too). In Scott's family kissing is on cheeks. In my family, it's on the mouth. In our combined family we've settled into kissing on the forehead or top of the head (except Joshua insists that I kiss him on the check). I need to find the picture of Scott kissing infant Jonathan on the forehead, it's precious.

Jonathan hugs Faith in the traditional way, wrapping his arms around her. However, Jonathan just presses himself up against everyone else for a hug. And, I realized after emailing Judith, Jonathan's never kissed anyone, even on the forehead.

We are okay with this, but we tease him about when he gets married, "Jonathan when the pastor says you can kiss the bride, are you going to kiss her on the forehead?" First of all, he doesn't want to talk about kissing girls right now. But he thinks me might marry, so he said, "Maybe. Probably" to how he's going to kiss his new bride.

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